Dreams Are Not So Simple

So I was thinking about dreams the other day. Everyone dreams in their sleep, the difference is that some people remember theirs, while others don’t. I remember my dreams, not all of them, but certainly the most important ones. None of them make any sense, but I believe that there is a purpose for dreams, a reason that they exist. Dreams are not only a figment of our imagination gone wild to create a simulation of an event that is occurring, they have hidden meanings. I know that my sister believes this as I do, but unlike me, she researches the meanings of her dreams in a dream dictionary on the internet (only sometimes though). I do not do this, because no one can possibly know the meaning of dreams, especially your dream. Only you have experienced this vision and although people may have ideas as to what certain things mean in a dream (separately), they do not know the whole context, or story, so they cannot know the meaning. Anyways, I believe that there is a deeper purpose behind everything, and that our minds have not simply conjured this story; I believe that it may even be a force that is sending us a message (not necessarily a god though).

I’ve had many dreams so far, that mostly relate to what I was last thinking of, or feeling before falling asleep. They all take place in different settings (once it was in a castle or at school, etc.) but somehow always involve the people whom I surround myself with. Most of them have a moral, or something being accomplished, but there have been dreams (or rather nightmares) that are rather gruesome (I am not going to describe any of them in detail here, for obvious reasons) with people dying, or me sacrificing myself for someone I love (this one is less of a nightmare). But, although nightmares are indeed unpleasant, I strongly believe that these have a deeper meaning as well. Dreams are like symbols in a good book, they appear to be simple, but in reality they represent different, more complex, ideas.

One thing I cannot stand is when I have a great dream, where something I’ve longed for happens (these are my favorite kind of dream), wake up and instantly forget everything. I can’t stand not remembering such a pleasant dream, and it frustrates me to remember everything until the second when my eyes flutter open, until the second where I am warped back to reality. I also hate waking up from a beautiful dream, because then I know that this never happened and probably never will. These dreams usually involve something to do with love, and the one I love, or like; I’m not sure if it is love, but it is the strongest feeling that I have ever felt so far (apart from pain, of course). This is silly in my opinion because dreaming that one day your “true love” will love you in return and you will live happily ever after, just builds your hopes up, only to destroy them when you awaken. But I am not getting into love in this post, maybe next time. Finally I can’t stand when you have such an amazing dream (as I previously mentioned) that you are disappointed when you wake up and remain day dreaming about a possibility that will probably never come (for now anyways).

All in all, I absolutely love dreaming and drifting into another world entirely, especially being whoever I want to be. I believe that without dreams (all kinds of dreams, dreams in your sleep as well as goals) we would be hopeless.

Sincerely,

                Me.

It's Not Only About Grief

Today is the 10^th anniversary of the 9/11 attack on the Twin Towers and the Pentagon. I am very touched by this event, even though I am not directly affected by it (I am not American). I still remember when I was four years old, and I walked into my parents’ bedroom on September 11, 2001. All I saw were flaming buildings on her TV set, and my mother's hands covering her face as she wept silently. I was confused, and when I asked why she was sad, she replied something like this “Estoy triste porque algo malo pasó en el mundo hoy” which is Spanish for “I am sad because something bad happened in the world today”.  Now, I can’t be certain that this was exactly what she replied, but I am certain that it was very close.  I was sad momentarily, but I moved on quickly (mainly because it didn't affect me, and because I was four and my dolls were more important to me). When I was older, I asked my mother why she was sad on that day, and this time she told me part of the whole story, but not all of it (I think she wanted to protect me from the evil in the world).

Recently, I visited Washington D.C. with my grade, and in the Newseum there was an area that was devoted to this horrid day in history. There was a satellite antenna from the actual towers, along with a wall covered in articles of September 11, 2001. Before my visit, I thought that 9/11 was a tragic day (which it was) and that it was only filled with grief. That was when I noticed a small notebook, where people could write anything about that day that they wanted, and in it was an entry that a girl wrote which said the following:

 

I’m glad my daddy missed his flight, or else I wouldn’t have anyone to walk me down the aisle.

 

                That was when I realized that it is not only a day of grief, but also a day to rejoice the lives that were saved. This girl’s father was saved, so we should be happy for her. I know that finding a happy story about this day is like finding a needle in a haystack, but I found one. This story wasn’t somber, it was happy, and I am thankful for the life that was spared. It has been ten years since this tragedy, but America is still recovering from the lives lost. And today, the world remembers the family members and heroes (the firemen and those who tried to help) that were lost. September 11, 2001 is a day that will never be forgotten, so as we remember those lives, we should also be thankful for those who were spared.

Sincerely,

                                Me.

It is Not Blood

Just to prove my point, the background is paint

It has come to my attention that the background looks like blood. Just to clarify, it is not blood: its paint. You see, I chose this background because I absolutely love art. I like to believe I started drawing and painting before I started talking, because art is such a great part of me that I can’t bear to imagine my life without it. I am the most creative member of my family, after my mother; she is by far a better cook, artist, and overall a tad more creative than I am, which is saying something.

 

I couldn’t take Art this year as a subject in school, but luckily I found a Watercolor class on Saturday mornings, so I have recently been going to those. Waking up is a drag, but it is entirely worth it, because I can just let everything out into my work, and painting soothes me. This one time, I was annoyed and angry at my family, but after going I was calm and relaxed. It was (and I can’t believe I am about to say this) better than sleeping and dreaming (and if you know me, you know that I look forward to both of these, but that is a subject for another time). I actually finished my first painting (it’s some tulips) and I would show a photo of it, but it’s being framed for an exhibition, so no can do. I have now started my next painting which is a surprise, because it is a gift (I would tell you the reason of it, but I’m afraid that the person will read this and the surprise will be ruined, so I’ll post later what the results were). Hopefully I can finish it next Saturday so that I have time to order a frame for it, because it’s Venezuela (where I am, right now) and things take a while over here.

So for those of you who thought it was blood in my background, it isn’t and that’s that (sorry to disappoint). So now you know, about my passion for art (which is a little more about myself, I guess)

Sincerely,

                Me.

PS: I have realized that my post titles all have the word 'not' in them. This is just a coincidence, there is no real pattern, and it is not something special (just in case you thought it symbolized something). 

Not an Introduction

The first post on a blog is typically the worst. They are almost always introductions, with excess information of one’s personality and likes and dislikes and detailed explanations of what to expect from the blog. I, for one, hate introductions; I hate telling new people my name and I can’t stand it when people who don’t know my name and call me “girl”, so for those of you out there who don’t know me, I’ll be known to you as Me (that is the best name I could come up with). If I were to introduce myself in an elaborate way I would be writing for hours and you would probably exit my blog after the first paragraph, but, luckily for you, I refuse to state my whole self in one post. I believe that you get to meet a person, and truly know them the longer you are around them, so therefore, you will learn more about me through my posts, rather than in only one. The one thing I will tell you right off the bat, is that I am not very fond of blogging – yet. It feels weird to pour out my thoughts, and share them, with an infinite number of unknown people and a handful of known ones. But I guess all it takes is time for me to finally open myself up to the world.  

I have started this blog (not really because I wanted to, but because it was asked of me as a class assignment) and I am honestly not sure what to write in it. I find it impossible to think of a single topic that I can constantly talk about. I guess I’ll write about myself (not about who I am, I don’t like doing that: please refer to paragraph one) about my life, and how my experiences have shaped who I am and who I’ll become (yes I know exactly how cheesy that sounded, but bear with me). (This next part of the post might sound completely off topic, but I promise it is relevant) Don’t you just hate it when people give you those “get to know you!” surveys? I’ll take them if I’m asked to, but you won’t ever see me filling one out on my free time. Or isn’t answering the question “Who are you?” annoying? I mean, how on earth is a person supposed to answer that question so that the listener won’t get bored? It sounds so easy to answer when in reality it is the most complex question I’ve ever heard. I don’t think anyone ever really knows the answer to that question, because no one can possibly know everything about themselves without having any doubts (or without leaving any questions on the surveys blank). I guess, to all of you out there, we will be finding who I am together (because I am not sure I can answer the question “Who are you?” right now).

Sincerely,

                Me